OK…this is a re-post from earlier in
the year, but with only a few days left before the election, it still may be worth
thinking about…
All of you
“Dog Whisperer” fans out there know what I am talking about when I say that,
“maybe we could “tweak” that whole…you gotta’ have been born in the US in order
to become president’ thing, if (and only IF) you (as a possible candidate) have the super powers of Cesar
Millan”. And before you start thinking me unpatriotic for wanting to amend the
Constitution, you need to hear (or in this case read) my logic out. Imagine the
US with a congress filled with “calm submissive” senators from both sides of
the isle. Imagine people actually willing to really work together in order to
“form a more perfect union.” Republicans and Democrats really wanting to please
their “masters”…er’ rather, I mean constituents, by doing what is asked of them
the first time around! And when these men and women who were voted into office
begin to step out of line, President Cesar snaps them back into focus with a
quick jab to their side and an authoritative vocal…“Tsssst!”
Now you’re getting the idea. Go ahead, send our ol’ pal the (not so calm)
assertive Mahmoud Ahmadinejad over, with his whole…”we want to use nuclear
weapons to kill a bunch of people” idea. Let’s just see how President Cesar
puts up with that one. About 5 seconds later, a swift heel to the mid section,
and his patented “Tsssst!” and it’s “game over” Mahmoud. High energy prices getting
you down? Mr. Millan can work on that one too! Think alternative energy. No,
not a $45,000 government subsidized vehicle that only gets you about 35 miles
on one charge, no sir. How about dog sleds pulled by packs of dogs willing to
go that extra mile for you, all for the price of a doggie treat, a scratch
behind the ears and a convincing “gooood boy!” at the end of the trip. Now
that’s alternative. So by now you might be thinking that maybe “Farmer Tony”
here has been out in the sun too long, or maybe he’s been inhaling too much
Round-Up. But wait, I have the best argument yet for trying it “Cesar’s Way.”
Everyone wants a balanced budget right? You want an end to government waste?
Cesar’s your guy! No more big, fancy and down right expensive parties at the
White House, with expensive gourmet meals and champagne, all at tax payers’
expense. Nope, just healthy, well balanced meals served with a nice bowl of
fresh clean water to wash it down with! And as far as all the money that is
spent on keeping the President safe, you can skip all the big tough looking
guys in black suits walking him to and from the presidential limousine.
President Cesar would simply need a pack of his hand selected pit bulls and
rottweilers circling him, keeping him safe as he goes to climb aboard his motor
home…”RV1” . Oh just think of the savings! Anyway, as the 2012 presidential
election gets closer, maybe we should start thinking “write in” candidate. And
if by some miracle he should win to become our next pack leader (president), we
would all just have to get used to the State of the Union address sounding a
little funny, with his south of the border accent, and congress cheering him
like an old episode of the Arseno Hall show from the 90's ("woof, woof,
woof"), but then again if you really think about it, our country always
was and is made up of all types of personalities and people of all colors,
religions and breeds, purebreds and mutts, long haired and short haired...OK,
maybe I am over thinking it, but you have to admit, all things considered in
America 2012, it really doesn't sound that crazy does it? "Woof!"
